Monday, July 17, 2006

World War III

I don't know if anyone caught it, but World War III started last week. You may not know it yet, because this is only the preface, but trust me, once you get into the first few chapters of the story, you see what I mean. For the few of us that will be left, you'll be able to say I remember when it all started. Just like the assassination of Archduke Franz Ferdinand, Israel's invasion of Lebanon will be the fuse that leads to the bomb. Everything was fine when the Israelis and Palestinians kept blowing each other up, but now they took it outside, and this one is going to end badly. If you think I'm kidding take a closer look, already there is posturing by the Syrians and Iranians to get their justifications out of the way, in case they can cobble together some pre-text for war. And just like in Backdraft, if they go, we go. Forget North Korea (for now), WHEN, not if, Israel damages something belonging to Syria or Iran, then they both jump into the battle, which pretty much means we're going to jump in too (which we want to anyway). Then followed by the British and then of course the Russians, then the Saudi's and Egyptians won't be able to stay out of it, and pretty soon everyone will be at war in the Middle East(well not everyone, but more on that later). And let's not forget that the Afghanis are already having trouble holding it all together, and we are all painfully aware of the state of Iraq. The whole thing is just waiting to blow into something crazy. And speaking of crazy, the Rapture people are salivating over this as the beginning of the end times (and this time they mean it.) For those of us who will be "left behind" and charged with telling the story of the last great war, we will know that it was started by, and finished by organized religion on behalf of their clients Judaism, Christianity and Islam. Cowboy George's Middle Eastern Adventure is going to come to a screeching halt in favor of Global Themonuclear War - shall we play a game? So now the world is at war. Who knows what other fronts will open up at the same time. Will India and Pakistan finally bomb each other? Will the Kurds see the instability as a sign and start their own revolution? And what about North Korea? Will they pull a Pearl Harbor and act because they think they can? And for all of you who have ever played RISK - what happens when all the major turf battles erupt into all out war? Everyone makes a horde and then tries to take over the world, but who always wins that battle. You got it, the guys in the purple countries who have been hoarding untouched all game. And in this scenario, who do you think that is? That's right, the Chinese. Everyone else is engaged everywhere else, and the Chinese take over the world. The End. I want everyone to bookmark this story and then if you are still here, come back in 2 years and see what happened. In the meantime I'll be learning Chinese; nihao!

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